"That's weird." I Was Schooled By a 12-Year Old British Girl (1)

A few weeks ago, I was in England playing golf with some old and new British friends. Lots of fun golf, laughs, probably a few too many pints, and a great time at a town club football match. (That would be soccer, for most of us Americans.)

The night before I was leaving, we were having dinner with my friend Brendan's family.

His 12-year-old daughter, Isabella, is an adorable, precocious young lady who is absolutely fascinated with Americans.

And she had QUESTIONS.

About everything.

What we eat. What we call things. Why we do certain things. The expressions we use. And especially how we pronounce words.

It was like being interviewed by a miniature British Barbara Walters. Except cuter. And with better follow-up questions.

She looked at me.

"That's weird."

At that point, I caught myself. I was conflicted.

Here I was, a guy who's invested more than 40 years teaching people how to communicate, being informed by a 12-year-old that I apparently didn't know how to pronounce water.

My first instinct was to explain that there was absolutely nothing weird about how I said it. Millions of Americans pronounce it exactly the same way.

But I resisted.

After all, what was I going to do? Launch into a sales objection-handling process with a 12-year-old British girl?

Besides, if you've ever tried to negotiate with a kid, you know they're some of the best salespeople on the planet. They'll wear you down until you surrender, just to make it stop. (Parents, am I right?)

Instead, I reminded myself of something I suggest salespeople do all the time: recognize that people believe what they believe, regardless of how those beliefs were formed.

To HER, the way I pronounced water really was weird.

She was just telling me what she believed, based on 12 years of experience.

And THAT brings us to something that can make you a hell of a lot more effective in sales.

It was a fact. To her. I talked weird.

Think about something you feel strongly about. Maybe it's politics. Or your favorite sports team. Or the proper way to cook a steak. (Actually, I don't care about personal interpretation here. If you're ordering a prime ribeye well-done, we might not be able to be friends. Anyhoo…)

Now imagine someone telling you you're completely wrong, then launching into a presentation to prove it.

What's your reaction?

"Wow, thank you for pointing out how stupid I've been all these years. You've completely changed my mind!"

Yeah. Right. If so, I bet you're not married or in a relationship.

More likely, you're mentally preparing your counterattack while they're still talking.

Yet that's exactly what salespeople do every day when they hear objections.

"Your price is too high."

"We're happy with our current supplier."

"That wouldn't work in our business."

"We wouldn't get enough value from that."

And BOOM.

The salesperson goes into defense mode.

They start explaining. Justifying. Searching for that clever one-liner they saw on LinkedIn. Anything to prove the prospect is wrong.

And what does the prospect do?

They dig in deeper.

Because now they're defending THEIR position against someone who's trying to change their mind.

Here's a fundamental principle I've taught for years:

You will rarely change someone's mind by telling them they're wrong. But you CAN help them begin to question whether what they believe is necessarily true.

That's where doubt-creating questions come in.

Doubt-creating questions get people examining the reasoning behind their own beliefs, and perhaps considering another possibility.

Here's how.

When someone says something you disagree with, your immediate reaction might be to correct them.

Don't.

Remember, the objection you hear is often just a symptom. There could be five or ten different reasons behind it.

You don't know which one you're dealing with until you get them talking.

So soften things first.

"Oh, I understand."

"Let's talk about that."

"Tell me more about that."

Simple stuff.

And your tone is everything. You want to sound curious about their thinking, not like you're about to cross-examine a hostile witness.

Let's say someone tells you:

"Your price is too high."

Most salespeople immediately start defending the price.

But wait a second.

What does "too high" even mean?

Higher than a competitor? Higher than what they expected? More than they have available? Or maybe they haven't seen enough value to justify the investment.

Those are entirely different situations.

So you might ask:

"Curious. How so?"

Then let THEM explain.

Simple.

Now that you've uncovered what's behind their objection, you can begin asking questions that might get them reconsidering their position.

One of my favorite questions for doing this is something I call the Zuck Question.

I got it from a CNN interview with Mark Zuckerberg.

The interviewer asked whether he was stepping down as Facebook's chairman.

He said that wasn't the plan.

Then she asked a brilliant follow-up:

"Would anything change that?"

Four words.

And suddenly he had to consider whether his position was absolute.

The Zuck Question is one example. Here's how the same doubt-creation principle works with a price objection.

Prospect: "Your price is too high."

You: "I see. Curious. How so?"

Prospect: "Well, you're about 20% higher than the other company we're considering."

Okay. Now we know we're dealing with a competitive price comparison.

But we still don't know whether the prospect sees any meaningful differences between the two options.

You: "What differences have you noticed between the two solutions?"

Prospect: "Well, your implementation and ongoing support seem more extensive. But I'm not sure that's worth paying more for."

Aha. Now we're getting somewhere.

The prospect recognizes differences but hasn't determined whether they're worth the additional investment.

NOW we can begin asking questions that might create some doubt about their original conclusion.

You: "Let's suppose you went with the lower-priced option. What concerns, if any, would you have about the implementation or support?"

Depending on the answer, you could explore the potential consequences with more questions specific to their situation.

Maybe they'll discover that the difference in support is worth considerably more than the 20% price difference.

Or maybe they won't.

Either way, they're evaluating the options more thoroughly, based on what matters to them.

You asked questions, listened, and used what you learned to determine where the conversation should go. The prospect did the thinking.

THAT'S doubt creation.

And the Zuck Question is just one tool you might use when the situation calls for it.

For example, after you've explored why someone believes they can't make a change, you might ask, "What would have to happen for that to change?"

But only when you've learned enough to know it's a relevant question.

Because asking the right question at the wrong time can be just as ineffective as giving a canned rebuttal.

And sometimes the prospect is RIGHT.

Maybe your price really is beyond their means. Maybe their current supplier is doing a fantastic job. Maybe there's a legitimate reason they can't do anything until next year.

Fine!

You want to find that out, too. We're in the business of helping people make decisions that are in their best interest. And sometimes that decision is not to buy from us.

So here's something to try on your next sales conversation.

When someone says something you disagree with, before you open your mouth to correct them, ask yourself:

"Under what circumstances could what they're saying be true?"

Then ask THEM a question to understand their reasoning. And when appropriate, follow with a question that helps them consider another possibility.

You might be amazed at how often people begin reconsidering their own positions when they don't feel they have to defend them.

As for my young British friend Isabella, I never did try to convince her that my pronunciation of water was perfectly normal.

And that's okay.

Although I still maintain she's the one with the accent.

Ever hang up after a sales conversation and think, "Damn, I wish I'd said THIS instead"?

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Speaking of objections, here's something I'm especially excited about with the Smart Calling AI Coach we're developing.

One of the things it will help you do is PREVENT objections from coming up in the first place.

I've said for years that salespeople create many of the objections they hear. They talk too much. They present things the buyer doesn't care about. They make assumptions. They fail to ask the questions that would have uncovered a concern before it became a problem.

Our AI Coach will help you prepare for calls so you can avoid making those mistakes.

But hey, even when you do everything right, you're still going to get resistance.

After your call, the Coach will help you analyze what happened.

How did you handle the objection? What did you do well? Where might you have missed something? What questions could you have asked that might have taken the conversation in a more productive direction?

The Coach will ask YOU questions, get you thinking about what happened, and help you recognize what you could have done differently.

That's how you actually get better.

Then it will help you prepare for the next time you encounter that objection, and anticipate what resistance you might hear in your next conversation with that same buyer.

Imagine getting better at handling resistance after every call, instead of making the same mistakes for the next 20 years.

Because we all know salespeople who've had 20 years of experience.

And some who've had one year of experience 20 times.

There's no shortage of AI sales tools promising to make more calls, send more emails, generate more messages, and automate more of the sales process.

Some of that technology is useful.

But I think there's an enormous opportunity that most of the AI sales world is overlooking.

Using AI to help salespeople become BETTER at the human part of selling.

Listening. Thinking. Understanding people. Asking great questions. Building trust. Helping others make decisions that are in their best interest.

The stuff I've invested my career teaching.

And the stuff I believe AI will never replace.

That's what we're building.

AI that helps you become a better HUMAN sales professional.

More on that soon.

Make it your best week ever!